Posts tagged "money"

Bitcoin not really accepted here

As news of more and more business accepting Bitcoin spreads, we’d like to take a moment to remind you that none of them are actually accepting Bitcoin. Instead, they rely on often-complex Rube Goldberg-esque “solutions” to sell things and claim they accept Bitcoin.

Have you considered accepting ActualMoney? It's revolutionary!

Have you considered accepting ActualMoney? It’s revolutionary!

In most cases, one of two companies get involved. Let’s say Buttcoin wants to accept Bitcoin for the service of mocking and laughing at you. We set up a bank account (a huge one, we’re filthy rich,) and then we contact either Bitpay or Coinbase to do the dirty work for us. They give us buttons and code to insert into our website, then what happens is as follows:

  1. User buys bitcoins with real money, using some frighteningly shady exchange or ATM.
  2. User sends bitcoins to Coinbase or Bitpay.
  3. Some sort of magic occurs; nobody really knows where the funding is from.
  4. Coinbase or Bitpay send real money to us.
  5. We mock and laugh at you.

We here at Buttcoin, or Overstock, or the Sacramento Kings, or the Lamborghini dealership, never directly deal with the bitcoins or the risk inherent in selling things for them. Bitpay or Coinbase absorb this risk somehow and deal with the random and violent fluctuations in “value.” In the end, everyone is happy or deluded. The business sees actual currency (whether it’s laundered or not is up to FINCEN to determine,) the middlemen get a cut, and bitcoiners get to shriek and proselytize about how widely accepted Bitcoin is and how it will take over the world, despite having a slew of issues that can’t or won’t be fixed.

Posted by killhamster - January 16, 2014 at 1:16 pm

Categories: Buttcoin, Editorial, Featured   Tags: , , , ,

How to make millions without even trying

Posted by killhamster - December 18, 2013 at 1:17 pm

Categories: Buttcoin   Tags: , , , ,

Stop Donating to Wikipedia

If you’ve browsed Wikipedia for any length of time, you’re certainly familiar by now with the site’s periodic donation drives. In order to cover hosting and bandwidth costs without slathering every page in advertisements, the Wikimedia Foundation asks that its users donate as little as $3 to help the site continue to bring to the world its extensive knowledge of the minutiae of anime plots and lightsaber combat. As the site manages massive amounts of traffic, these drives are fairly frequent now, leading to what very well could be the mating call of the bitcoiner:

“Wikipedia should accept donations in Bitcoin!”

Read more…

Posted by killhamster - December 13, 2013 at 2:09 pm

Categories: Editorial, Featured   Tags: , , , , ,

Move over, Bitcoin, SUPER MONEY is here


Posted by killhamster - December 6, 2013 at 12:27 pm

Categories: Buttcoin   Tags: , , , , , ,

pirateat40 screwed, Bitcoin is real money as a result

In case you’re not following closely, pirateat40 (AKA Trendon Shavers) has been formally charged by the SEC, and a judge has given the case a green light. The filed a “show cause” that seized Shavers’ assets before trial, and this is his real, unedited response to this action:



Defendant’s preliminary response to show cause

The court does not have jurisdiction because it is not within the securities law.

1) freezing Defendants’ assets;
It’s ridiculous for the court to freeze my assets that are required to pay rent, utilities, food, etc and be able to pay for an attorney. My wife does not work and cares for our two children.

2) directing Defendants to provide verified accountings to the Commission;
The court has no authority to order this because it is not within the jurisdiction and does not show a need for it.

3) authorizing expedited discovery concerning the location and extent of Defendants’assets;
Three days is too short and there is no reason for it based on other orders. This should be revised based and agreed to.

Have we mentioned he is appearing pro se in court? This should be amazing.

In his ruling, judge Amos Mazzant made the mistake of saying “It is clear that Bitcoin can be used as money” and bitcoiners have taken this to mean that the US court system, along with the rest of the world governments, have declared Bitcoin to be a real currency that will soon destroy the US Dollar, Euro, various Pesos, and so on. Some have simplified it to the point that they are just shouting “Bitcoin is MONEY” at no one in particular.


1 comment
Posted by killhamster - August 8, 2013 at 10:32 am

Categories: Buttcoin   Tags: , , , , , ,

Bitcoin Briefcase Converts… hold on I have some more quarters here

I was at DEF CON 21 this weekend and in between drinking and drinking, caught several demonstrations of this ridiculous thing:


Read more…

Posted by killhamster - August 5, 2013 at 11:30 am

Categories: Buttcoin   Tags: , , , , ,

The Greatest Story Never Told

papamoi wants to mine bitcoins, and badly. In March he started asking around for info on some serious butt-mining hardware, looking for ASIC arrays and “super servers” that would feed his need for unbridled wastefulness. BFL wasn’t shipping, Avalon was only sending out orders in batches, and nobody else was producing comparable hardware, and his search had him running in unfulfilling circles until he found Liquid Nitrogen Overclocking.

Our story’s hero pestered the guys at Liquid Nitrogen Overclocking about building a custom mining server, and they responded that they could build him something that provided 1.7 terahashes of bitcoin-mining waste. Of course, he wanted proof, and they gave him the run-around several times, responding with jargon, claims of NDAs, and even appearing to confuse gigahashes with gigahertz. All the while papamoi has been scouring the BitcoinTalk forums for chips, PCB designers, and other high-performance hardware, to no avail.

Our intrepid hero was put off, but then the Liquid Nitrogen Overclocking team said the magic word: “Google.” Apparently Google has been buying “super servers” from Ed Trice in Philadelphia, instead of major, well-known manufacturers such as Dell, HP, or IBM. Lured in by the promise of amazing Google-caliber hardware, papamoi continued, and was surely happy to find that Google was totally cool with the fellows at Liquid Nitrogen selling some pubbie their exclusively designed servers.

Read more…

1 comment
Posted by killhamster - April 29, 2013 at 2:43 pm

Categories: Buttcoin   Tags: , , , , ,

Bitcoins are headed for $100 and there’s nothing to stop it now.

Bitcoin is on an unending march towards mainstream adoption and with that, $100 bitcoins are nearly here. We just had a $10 jump in the last 12 hours and it’s obvious we’re on a run away freight train to the currency of the future.

I would like to formally apologize to anyone I doubted. I am truly jealous of everyone’s sage investment strategies and now I’m stuck with my dick in my hand while everyone else is getting rich. Are we going to see $1000 in the future? The captains of industry tell me so.

To Bitcoins! up uP UP!



Posted by Buttcoin - March 21, 2013 at 10:24 am

Categories: Buttcoin   Tags: , , , , , ,

Yet another Bitcoin business is hacked; BitInstant loses $12k in social engineering scam

You may have heard the news by now, but popular Bitcoin payment provider BitInstant was hacked last week. It wasn’t a massive hack like we’ve seen on MyBitcoin or Mt. Gox so I didn’t see much reason to write on it when I saw it 3 days before Wired’s article, but as I looked at it more I figured I’d point out some interesting points.

First, the hack was a regular social engineering hack. Really simple stuff.

Over the weekend the BitInstant team has been hard at work securing our system from a sophisticated attack on Thursday evening. Overall, due to major choke points and redundancies in our system, the hacker was only able to walk away with $12,480 USD in BTC, and send them in 3 installments of 333 BTC to bitcoin addresses.

The attacker contacted our domain registrar at Site5 posing as me and using a very similar email address as mine, they did so by proxying through a network owned by a haulage company in the UK whom I suspect are innocent victims the same as ourselves. Armed with knowledge of my place of birth and mother’s maiden name alone (both facts easy to locate on the public record) they convinced Site5 staff to add their email address to the account and make it the primary login (this prevented us from deleting it from the account). We immediately realized what was going on, and logged in to change the information back. After changing this info and locking the attacker out, overnight he was able to revert my changes and point our website somewhere else.

After gaining access, they redirected DNS by pointing the nameservers to in germany, they used hetzner’s nameservers to redirect traffic to a hosting provider in ukraine. By doing this, he locked out both my login and Gareths’s login and they used this to hijack our emails and reset the login for one exchange (VirWox), enabling them to gain access and steal $12,480 USD worth of BTC.

BitInstant is shifting the blame totally on the host. Never mind the fact that they used real, publicly accessible information on of the owners wide-open Facebook page, this is totally the host’s fault.

Site5 has since responded since the hack.

Security & Social Engineering

This day and age requires us all to be security-conscious ?? especially when it comes to our identities and our online accounts. To help promote our company goal of open communication, I wanted to share with our customers and non-customers alike a situation that recently occurred.

What happened?

A customer of ours recently had their account taken over by someone impersonating them. Wired picked up the original story, and in interest of maintaining openness, I wanted to outline our role in it since we were mentioned.

How did they gain access?

The impersonator gained access to the account because they knew the answers to both of the security questions the customer chose for the account. The impersonator did not gain the knowledge of the personal information from Site5 staff.

Once we are provided correct answers to security questions, the person is considered verified and we will make account modifications as requested. This includes password resets, email address changes, and other changes. As evident by the articles, this is exactly what transpired.

Our staff followed procedure every step along the way. To reiterate ?? at no point did we provide the impersonator the answers to the security questions.

It??s a very unfortunate situation, and we absolutely helped our customer as quickly as we could when the issue was reported to us.

Let’s back up a bit here and explain what BitInstant does. BitInstant is one of many ways to convert your Bitcoins to USD and vice versa. They hook into various exchanges such as Mt. Gox and facilitate the conversion faster than many of these exchanges do themselves.

They also take your security super serious, which is why they have strong language like this on their website:

Encrypt everything, use default deny on all firewalls, lock down ACLs and filesystem access, restrict syscalls on daemon processes and trust nobody. We assume that 24/7, somebody is actively trying to break into our system and is desperate to do so. This assumption assures that in the scenario where the bad guys are not so active our system stands up.

Except if you let the world know your place of birth on your facebook page.

Going back to the original hack, one key point to make is that even though the guys got access to their emails, multi-factor auth could have prevented this. And BitInstant used multi-factor auth on all their exchanges except one, Virwox, which is used to convert Linden dollars or something. VirWox has had multi-factor auth for a while now, BitInstant simply failed to impliment it. Weakest link in the chain and all that.

It also says something when you claim the hacker wasn’t very sophisticated yet he was still able to make off with $12k of your customer’s money.

No where in that “transparent” blog post however is how or when the missing money will be replaced, or even if it belongs to customers in the first place.

Some customers are claiming they are missing money however.

It’s been almost 6 days and I have yet to see the bitcoins I got from Bit instant. I’m missing over 200 dollars. (self.Bitcoin)

submitted  ago by DucoNihilum

I deposited 200 cash for conversion to bitcoins Monday hoping to see my coins after a few minutes to an hour.

Instead, even after numerous unanswered emails, calls, and PM’s here on reddit I have yet to get my money or even an explanation of what is going on.

Has this sort of situation happened to any of you?

There’s a lot more people in that comment thread with shitty experiences.

He’s not the only one:

Anyone else out there having troubles with this company lately? I’ve been waiting for 3 days for them to process my transaction. For a one hour service that they advertise. I’ve been given no exsplanation for what caused the delay just keep getting told we are going to process it when contacting there support. Are there any alternatives to bitinstant out there? Thanks Just need to vent

3 days to fund Bitcoin purchases when the price can swing $10 in that time.


In my opinion, BitInstant is just another half-baked bitcoin idea, wandering aimlessly with no real business plan and not taking their jobs as seriously as they should be.

How many more of these sites need to get hacked before you stop giving them your money?


1 comment
Posted by Buttcoin - March 9, 2013 at 11:43 pm

Categories: Buttcoin   Tags: , , ,

Don’t be this guy

May he forever get watery, overpriced drinks.


Posted by killhamster - March 2, 2013 at 10:57 am

Categories: Buttcoin   Tags: , , , ,

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